5 Ways to Become Emotionally Pragmatic
Take control of your emotions and the rest will follow…
Easier said than done, dwelling on past hurts and memories will never make us move forward as these soul-wrenching incidents not only kick up years of disappointments, anger, and resentment that we hold against people who have potentially tried to tarnish our image. Is there a way out to live the life that we all desire? Yes is the answer and the way forward is ‘Emotional Pragmatism.’ What is emotional pragmatism? ‘Being rational and realistic still leaves room for important emotions. Some of us are born as pragmatists and others learn to be pragmatic, but either way, we experience inherent conflicts between pragmatism and emotion — a dynamic balance that is sometimes easy and sometimes quite the opposite.’(Source: Google Search)
I have a personal admiration for the Japanese, every time they are struck by an earthquake they are able to piece their life together in a matter of a few months.
How are they able to get over this earth-shattering tragedy time and again and move on? They are admirably stoic, calm, and composed. Thanks to Buddhism and Zen and they don’t blame God, nature, or their destinies. They just carry on as if nothing has occurred. Well, this is not possible for everyone but taking responsibility for what has happened and being able to take life-changing decisions are crucial for personal growth and mental peace. The blame game does not work in the game of life. A quick run through the five ways of becoming emotionally pragmatic can save us from heartburns and heartaches, which usually take years to heal.
Accept the Truth
Reality is harsh and always on the face. Whatever the tragedy or a life-altering experience the only way forward is to accept the truth. A quote by an anonymous writer re-enforces this truth about reality ‘Being rational and realistic still leaves room for important emotions — love, compassion, empathy, and sharing — while having enlightenment, seeking truth, and maintaining perspective. Spending time with like-minded people reinforces these values.’(Source: Google Search)
While being pragmatic is important, there is still room for other emotions to play a vital role in our emotional health and mental well-being.
Live in the ‘NOW’
The past is history and the future is unknown looming large ahead of us waiting for it to be lived. So what do we have is the present which is the ‘NOW. ‘But most people don’t understand this fact of life but worry about the future unnecessarily. While it is not completely possible not to worry about the future which is a natural human tendency it is equally important for us to focus our attention on the tasks at hand which are in the NOW. Living a mundane and boring life daily will take us forward which we call the FUTURE.
Meditation and Yoga
Feeling devastated and lost? Not the right time to sit and fret, especially after the biggest devastation in human history- COVID-19. Time to get up, pull up our socks, gather our bearings, and move on with a strong resolve to live for ourselves and above all our emotional health and well-being. Natural calamities, diseases, and upheavals are a part and parcel of life, but every time if we choose to get overwhelmed by them then we will continue to live in a dark and deep chasm of unhappiness and self-ruin. Early morning unguided meditation without the help of fancy gadgets or mobile phones can help calm the noise, violence, and disturbing images in our heads. Continuous practice of deep meditation will finally bring us the much-needed peace and clarity that we once craved for. Yoga can do wonders if practiced daily for thirty minutes. This helps to connect the mind with the body effortlessly after months of disciplined practice and can do wonders for a fettered soul.
Find a Purpose
It has never been easy for any human being on this earth to pick up the broken pieces of their lives and move forward. As we all carry with us a huge baggage of memories — good or bad that continues to weigh us down. While it feels good to dwell on fond memories, it is the bad ones that continue to haunt us with guilt and anguish. At this crucial juncture it is important to find a purpose- writing a book, painting, music, teaching, and gardening can bring the much-desired peace and calm back into our mundane and miserable lives.
Give, Give, Give and Grow
Giving does not necessarily mean being charitable monetarily but giving also means sharing your time, expertise, compassion, and empathy with people who really need it. Spending time at old age homes, and orphanages, teaching children reading, and opening a library at home are some of the life-altering habits that can actually make us grow and come out of any adversity that once threw us out of balance. Growing socially can bring us close to people with the same interests and hobbies. Going out together for a movie, lunch or a picnic builds bonds of friendship and human comfort. Bring other meaningful human experiences into your lives to help you connect with other people who are strangers. This will help you grow and who knows someone standing at the end of the rainbow may be just the magic that you wanted in your life.
My post ends with a quote on human suffering, ‘Without pain, there would be no suffering, without suffering we would never learn from our mistakes. To make it right, pain and suffering is the key to all windows, without it, there is no way of life.’ Angelina Jolie.
